The chewing hobby.

There's something going on in my neck of the woods.They have discovered a lump in my groin and you'd think the world was coming to an end.It doesn't bother me in the least. I can run, jump and do all my other things like cleaning myself all over and scrabbling on the sofa but they have gone into a fits of gloom. M thinks it's a hernia, well I am an elderly guy like him but it seems rabbits who have been, you know, snipped and pruned don't get them on the whole. Anyway, he's just a people doctor and doesn't know about rabbits so it means a visit to the vet on Tuesday. We can't go any sooner because Simon, my specialist vet broke his leg skateboarding in Australia over Christmas and isn't working at the moment. I'm going to have words with him about the knack of growing old gracefully when I see him. Honestly. Humans!! Fortunately his wife, Kim will be there so I am going to see her.

The locum is probably a good chap but I will only consult a rabbit specialist and my lot would never ever allow a non rabbit specialist to give me an anaesthetic. What a muddle. I'm not in the least bothered because I know I feel fine.

My friends Spike and Poppy are in trouble. They have learned how to escape from their overnight den and sleep in the living room by the fire. Somebody had chewed through the fireside rug overnight and they got the blame. Nobody can swear they saw them do it but it's easier to blame Spike and Poppy than Edward who only has one tooth.

House rabbits have a lot to put up with as far as chewing goes. I wouldn't say I have been responsible for much damage in my house. I chewed a bit of the wood on the TV cupboard because the doors were closed and it was time for the Simpsons, frilled the edge of the sofa arm cover trying to dig a burrow to hide in just in case I needed an escape route in a hurry and neatened the carpet fringe a smidge but nothing that didn't need doing.

Unlike cats we rabbits have a very important reason for chewing. If we didn't our teeth would grow much too long and we would need to have them filed down. Ugh. Now my pen pal, half-a-tail Mimi has had to call the electrician in Paris on several occasions to repair the table lamps and the computer but I haven't done anything like that. She looks quite innocent but definitely has a strong chewing streak.

And take dogs. Labradors in particular. Chew? If rabbits hadn't invented chewing, Labradors would.

Nope, rabbits have chewing rights. If you don't want a few artistic nibbles around the house don't get a house rabbit. Or get one who understands house rules like me.

Time to polish my halo.
We are frantic with worry.

Things I might do this year. Or not.

So far my New Year list of things to do is going to plan and am allowing J to pick me up to cuddle me more often. It's a bit scary when I see her hands coming down but I close my eyes and try hard not to run away. Once I'm up there it's not so bad. We cuddle first thing each morning for quite a long time, in fact I usually drop off to sleep up against her shoulder while I'm being stroked.
I used to hate it and it's taken me 8 and a half years to come to terms with it but there you are. I am a companion animal after all so maybe the time has come to behave like one.

I won't have it any other time of the day though. Absolutely not. The rest of the day is mine and I like to stick to a routine. Routine is the thing a rabbit needs. Fortunately I have an excellent memory and an acute sense of timing and I can tick off my daily list of things to do in perfect order. You will all know what they are by now. First thing eat slice of carrot, cuddle, eat slice of banana, bottom check, eat miserably thin slice of carrot as reward. Poo. Settle down for nap until main breakfast. Line up pellet food and greens and lie between them in case of marauders. Nap. Eat, nap.Eat, eat nap, eat, nap. Nap, eat. Sleep all afternoon. Snore loudly. Finish off any leftovers then into sitting room for TV, hay box, new hay bag and long cuddles on floor.

When I was younger I used to do a lot of hurtling round the house but I will be nine in six months so I'm starting to take it easy.

I might go outside when the weather warms up a bit and depending on Molly, the cat at the bottom of the drive. She has been particularly cheeky lately and has been coming up to eat the bird food. Don't tell me cats are fussy eaters! It all depends on scarcity value if you ask me and being jealous of my feathered friends when they come down to peck. She wouldn't admit it to the humans she lives with of course. She would turn her nose up if they tried to give her dry crusts and bacon rind but put it down for the birds and all of a sudden it's her most favourite thing. I expect she is sick when she goes home but it doesn't put her off.I had to baby sit again today. I'm teaching Edward to throw things around. He's crawling now and came into my very own hutch space under the table. I'm not sure I was all that pleased but if it's the only way I can give him lessons then I am willing to share. He threw my dozing mats around reasonably well and I tossed his toys in the air with my usual expertese. Then we went into the sitting room and played with my hay bag. I was the first to give in and hopped back for a doze. I am much older though.
I made a new friend recently. Her name is Jessica and you can see her photograph if you click onto her message at the bottom of my last diary entry. She has a very smart coat in my opinion.

Time for a nap.