Ouch!

That duck has just bitten me! She has a huge mouth.. All I did was wander over to see what she was eating and she pecked at me. They still put tasty looking food down for her and I wanted to try it. She's getting uppity because she has laid more eggs but we don't know where. She must know she will never get the babies out from here nor from next door because they have walls and fencing all round to keep their dog in. She is one of the most silly things I have ever known. At least the cats and dogs I have lived with had more sense and didn't lay eggs around other people's gardens. It's the ducklings I feel sorry for. Poor little things.

J is worrying now in case I catch some disease. She doesn't use a litter tray you know. The duck I mean.Not J. Messy creature.

Still, I'm feeling more important than that duck because I have a double page spread in the latest Rabbiting On magazine. I'm a celeb and I didn't have to be skinny to do it.
That pesky blackbird is still nagging for grapes and sultanas. Has nobody told him about worms?Worms are for blackbirds, grapes and sultanas are for rabbits. Now he has a baby as well and has brought it onto my patch.

Don't look down at me like that. I'm not going to give you any of my grapes.

Jamais plus.

I can't remember the last time I cried but I can't stop at the moment. All the babies are dead. They didn't make it to the lake. Twelve little beaks and twenty four little flat, webbed feet. They must have fallen behind her one by one and she wouldn't have known. All the pleasure they had in life was a dip in a drop of water in an old Swiss roll tin in the garden and the sun on their faces for a couple of hours.

She's back here again with the two drakes and they have forgotten. I wish I could.

If the drakes are still fertile she could produce another brood. I hope she doesn't.

I wish I had forced them into a carrier and taken them myself.

I wish...................

Would you believe it, those ducks are back. Just as I was going out of the back door for a breath of fresh air she arrived on the step begging for food. Huh! When can a rabbit have his garden to himself!

A Right Royal Occasion

It's a boy! It's a girl........................................

I'm an uncle at last to 12 adorable ducklings. They don't have names so I've called them all Harvey. My lot wanted to name them after some of the plants in the garden, Bluebell, Forget-me-not, Parsley, Rose and so on but I prefer something simpler. Harvey One through to twelve seems much more sensible.

I knew they would be the best ever because they belong to me. Even the two drakes came down for the first outing.

None of them wanted to go .......

..... but after playing around and drying off for a couple of hours or so, we herded them across the paddock.......

.......past the pigsty and into the farmer's field.

When she got them all through the gap she turned and quacked at us before she set off for the lake.

Oh, well, I've got my garden back even if the cantankerous blackbird is still around. He must be well stuffed with my raisins by now.

What wedding?

We were amazed at the attention of the drakes having been led to believe they opted out once the duck began to brood. They have remained at her side to the end.

Easter Bunday

And I'm the Easter bunny! Yea, I'm in the Pets Corner for Easter Sunday in the Telegraph! Not the Puddleby-on-the-Marshduck Telegraph but the BIG Sunday Telegraph. It's all about me, me , me.

There'll be one jealous duck in my garden take my word for it.

I sent them two photographs but they only used one of them. The other was a magnificent picture of one of my very best caecotrophs, the biggest ever. Maybe they thought nobody would want to look at it while they were eating their toast and drinking their coffee. Can't think why not. Mind you, they got it wrong about me living in a town too. I'm a Shire rabbit through and through. Open skies, dusty lanes, songbirds, ducks....................Ducks? Did I say ducks? Oh, carrots!!Anyway, for my family, friends and fans out there, here's the missing photo.

Jealous?

It's all about ducks here so I'm huffing. It's "Is she off her nest yet?" "Has she come down for food this morning?" "Have the boys come to see her today?" It's ducks, ducks, ducks, nothing but ducks.

I went outside yesterday to check for myself. It's my garden for goodness sake even though I don't bother much with it. You can't cover everything if you're a house rabbit but that doesn't mean I want other folk in there poking their noses into my affairs.

I prepared a few scrapes ready for my carrots, did a good bit of trimming the flat leafed parsley and checked out one or two of the borders but didn't spot or smell her. She must be well hidden. There was nobody in the pond either. I'll be glad when those chicks hatch and we can get back to me being centre stage. Can't be too long now for goodnss sake. She's making a real meal of this giving birth. We rabbits find it so easy.There's never this sort of fuss with does.

Harve is sitting by the back door repelling mallards. He stamps his back foot which has no effect whatsoever on the ducks. They are from the gravel lake down the lane or maybe the nearby river and are familiar with rabbits. They are not fazed. The female has decided this is the place to lay her eggs as she did last year and her two henchman have no say in the matter.Two? One has a limp and is guarding her more with hope than conviction that he is the father. They stick closely together and follow her every move. She seems to have forgotten the cottage garden is walled and although she can fly in, her chicks will not be able to fly out. Maybe she assumes we will open the gate just at the right moment. Whatever her instinct has told her she feels this is a familiar and safe haven.

We feed them once a day with corn and in return she has cleared the duck weed from the pond. The drakes quack as they eat while she sings contentedly on the same note.

Once she has layed her eggs and is sitting on them, her devoted husbands will leave her to it and return to the lake having done their duty by her. Hopefully our daily bonding will help us to assist her return the quarter of a mile down the lane to the lake to take her chance with her babies when the shooting season starts again. We can do no more.

She's been writing in my diary again and missed the bit where I chased the squatters up to the pond! Harve the Hero saves the day! Does that duck really believe she will be able to fit 12 ducklings in there with her?

Sunbeams and Seaside

It's sunbeam time again. I can't think why anyone would want to shiver outside when you can have your own sunbeams in your own kitchen and under your own table-hutch. Mmm it's the best.

They've been away for a few days but I didn't miss them. Had to go to the vet for my usual shave before they went but I didn't mind much. I feel a bit cooler now. I ignored them when they came back, didn't bother to get up because I was much too cosy and tired. After an hour or so I joined them and leapt about and binkied in case they had forgotten who I am.

I've been invited to go with them next time they go to the seaside as long as I don't leave any bits about the hotel. I wouldn't do that in a strange room anyway. I like to keep other peoples' places tidy. The trouble is they allow dogs to stay which wouldn't be any good for me so I won't bother. My best friend Pauline wouldn't want me to go because she loves me and looks forward to keeping me company and sorting my food and other comfort stuff for me. Anyway I get more sleep when I'm on my own and time passes very quickly.